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If your toddler or preschooler tends to whinge and whine, you’re not alone!
Why do toddlers & preschoolers whinge?
Toddlers and preschoolers tend to whinge and whine to get attention and to help them get what they want. They aren’t purposely trying to be irritating, although sometimes it seems that way!
Whinging begins around age 2 when toddlers are just learning to talk, but are still used to crying to get their own way.
Whinging also tends to peak in a toddler's or preschooler's development when they are feeling out of control and overwhelmed. Young kids lack the vocabulary to articulate their frustrations, and whinging is their natural default noise.
Young kids continue to whinge because their parents respond to it and they know they will get a reaction.
So how do you break the whinging habit?
9 Ways to help stop young kids whinging
Here are some tips you can use to help stop your toddler or preschooler whinging and to help them learn a better way to ask for what they want.
1. Have patience
Patience on your part becomes the first rule when confronted with these early bouts of whinging.
2. Stay calm
Stay calm and neutral. Your toddler or preschooler needs to know that you won’t react to a whingy voice.
3. Stop responding
Stop responding to whinging. Make it clear that if your toddler or preschooler whinges for something, you'll automatically say no. Or pretend you can't hear them if they do.
4. Be firm and consistent
Don’t give in. Within a week or so, you’ll likely notice a change in the way your toddler or preschooler asks for things and talks to you.
You are teaching them that they have a choice about how they behave.
5. Reinforcement
Besides being consistent, look for ways to reinforce the behaviour you do want, like thanking your toddler or preschooler when they speak in a normal tone.
6. Acknowledge your kids need for attention
Toddlers and preschoolers sometimes resort to whinging when they're tried and have failed to get their parents' attention.
That's why they’ll often whinge when you're focusing on something else and they need (or think they need) your help with something.
7. Work out what triggers your kids whinging
Certain triggers, such as when they are hungry or tired can also cause
toddler tantrums and meltdowns.
So keep that in mind the next time you take your toddler or preschooler grocery shopping close to nap time!
8. Introduce some humour
Acknowledge that your toddler or preschooler wants something and try using humour to help address the problem.
Something along the lines of, “Ouch, my ears are hurting. I know that you want something, but I can’t understand you when you use that voice. Can you find another way to tell me what you want?”
9. Teach your kids to ask for things differently
Teach your toddler or preschooler how to ask for things without whinging by modelling how you want them to speak and what you want them to say.
For instance, in an even tone, ask them to repeat a sentence, such as “Mummy, please can I have something to eat.”
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Image source: Mybaba
